If I smile and don't believe.
If suddenly I know I'm not sleeping.
If anything is better than to be alone.

SoundCloud / Foxes Official

My yahoomail seems so laggy. I subscribe too much, lol. So today I want to clean up and after 3 phases (open mail-unsubscribe-back to inbox), it always started to freeze. Idk whether I’ve got to have a new email or keep patient and do all the unsubscribe. 

I find myself feeling depressed lately. It’s holiday and get even worse. It’s so sad that you have to suffer flat feet and cannot run on treadmill and keep gaining weight. It’s so sad to do housework and hardly ever meeting friend. It’s so sad to keep practicing piano when you don’t even have a heart on it. And when it comes to college, I just don’t really feel to study. It’s true that you don’t have to do the things you like to walk on your life, but it’s a burden to me. Having a raised temperature at night and feeling weary whole day adding point moreover. Considering to put off my teaching job and hoping money from parents is really not independent, right? But I need the time, to focus on what I want to do all this time, practicing, and some free time to cure my mind. I find my nails scratching over my face and hurts me some time, but it’s okay cause I’m really cool. Ha ha

anw, happy chinese new year. today is the eve and I’ve planned to do some meditation but forget to bought colorful and scentful candles (ergh). I think I should just meditate in sleep. 

Raised temperature won’t let me do anything anymore so I’ll just post this and get some sleep. Good night from Medan xoxo!


Congratulations on ur oscar nom Lupita!

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